So while I was off last week, the tall Dane who shares a cubicle wall comes over to Stephanie, who everyone knows is a good friend of mine, and asks her.... "so, are the rumors true?"
I have become *the* office rumor it seems, and I'm not entirely sure how long its been going on, haha!.
I got another insight into it when I was chatting with a girlfriend that I came out to right before I hurt my back, she told me that now that she knows, she realizes that there has been 'talk' about me all around the office for a little bit now, and yeah, lots of people have figured it out. On a very positive note, she said that overall she has heard one single negative bathroom related thing, which seemed to have been dealt with by the other women talking to the complainer, but other than that, people are simply curious, not judgmental.
and that's all pretty damn cool!... only one complainer so far?, I'll take it!
I had always figured that I would have used the rumor mill to my advantage at one point, and the coming out that I did 2 weeks ago was in fact the beginning of that, but oh well, the rumors have preceded me, and I'm totally OK with that. Hell, this is happening regardless, the more people that know before the "official" email comes out about me, the better, and if its being taken care of on its own, even better still!. After all, I can't sit down and talk to each of the other 250 some employees at the bloody company, even if they all know who I am....
in 42 days, I'll be sitting here at my kitchen table at the end of my first day as Dawn at work.... whoah.... hahahahhahaha, crazy!
The girls I told about me before leaving, as well as another manager, and another sweet girl I told this morning, all took it great. The women really seem to accept me fully as "one of the team", it feels entirely genuine from them, and almost all of them have volunteered a "oh don't worry about the bathroom, I don't know how anyone would have a problem with that" comment to me which again, awesome.
My therapist asked me yesterday if 6 months ago, I would have believed where I am right now at this second, looking at social transition just 6 weeks away, and I cracked up in laughter. I counted the months from Nov 2011, eighteen months.... its been eighteen months since I came back out and put my makeup on for the first time in ages, and now I've been on hormones for two months already.... this was supposed to be impossible.... then it was supposed to still be far away..... and all of a sudden, its here.
and I'm beautiful
and I cried out of sheer happiness for the first time since my wedding day
love you all, thank you all for your help in this, and if you think I may be talking to you, I probably am
thank you
Dawn
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